Overcome
“We must convince ourselves that the worst enemy of a rock is not a pickaxe or any other such implement, no matter how sharp it is. No, its worst enemy is the constant flow of water which drop by drop enters the crevices until it ruins the rock’s structure.” (Saint Josemaria, “Christ is Passing” at 77).
I was recently very worried about someone who I love very much.
This person was making decisions that I could see were going to be very problematic. The worst part of the worry was that the person was insisting on making decisions that were very bad for them and that were not in their best interests. And still I could not stop this person from making decisions that were not in their own best interests.
This experience caused me a great deal of distress. I worried about this person very much. I worry about this person, still.
And as I was worrying about them, I began to think of Saint Monica. Saint Monica worried about her son, Saint Augustine, but she did not waste her worry needlessly. Instead, she focused her worries into prayers. Instead, she decided to use the suffering and anguish caused by her worries as a sacrifice. In this way, she was able to offer herself into sanctification and she did this as she offered her son…
And this did not last a day or a week or a month or a year or even ten years. This state of perpetual suffering lasted thirty-one years. This state of distress and prayer lasted thirty-one years. For thirty-one years this mother went after the lost sheep. He was at the forefront of her mind. He was the focus of her prayers. She thought of him and asked God to help him. This was her constant prayer.
That sort of fortitude is intense and unusual. Usually, people offer a little bit for a short while. Rarely does it last years and decades. Usually, people pray for an intention for a short while. Rarely, do they persist.
And as I was thinking about what an extreme example of fortitude this was, I suddenly considered that the greater miracle was perhaps not the conversion of her son, but of Saint Monica’s ability to overcome herself each day. She overcame the temptation to give up. She overcame the temptation to be afraid. She overcame the temptation to doubt God. She overcame the temptation to rely on her own efforts.
She submitted to the inner struggle and in that she was able to be constantly reshaped into what God required of her. Saint Josemaria wrote in “Christ is Passing” at 77, “We must convince ourselves that the worst enemy of a rock is not a pickaxe or any other such implement, no matter how sharp it is. No, its worst enemy is the constant flow of water which drop by drop enters the crevices until it ruins the rock’s structure.”
And I have been reflecting on that as I pray for that loved person today. For it seems that all I am required to do is resist my own weakness drip by drip by drip… God can do the rest. God can…
For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.
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