Conformity

“Because of this goodness, every will should be obedient, subject, and submissive to Him, and should be conformed and united forever, everywhere, and in all things to His divine intentions. (Saint Francis de Sales, “Finding God’s Will for You”, page 10).

Judas Iscariot The Arrest of Christ Kiss of Judas panel (Fresco by Giotto)

I have been reflecting on God and on my own unwillingness to submit.

How many times are my prayers just fruitless bargaining attempts where I am trying to convince the Almighty that He should conform to my will instead of me conforming to His…?

I have three adolescent children.  Each of those children is – quite naturally – trying to assert a little independence for their mother (me).  And that means that very often I am reduced to negotiating and arguing with children about why the things that I want them to do or the ways that I want them to behave are worthwhile and good and in their best interests.  Very often my children believe that they know more than I know and understand more of what they need than I could ever understand.  And this causes so much conflict.  After all, there are some things that I simply know through experience, and I am unwilling to compromise on for their very safety. 

Take for example, the idea that my children should be allowed to spend the school holidays completely alone while I go about my work and leave them entirely unsupervised.  Now, I am not judging anyone and the decisions that other mothers make in relation to their children, but knowing my own children, I know that if I were to leave my children unsupervised for the majority of the day, they would never get off their games and would never venture outside.  They would never eat anything remotely healthy and would probably fight with each other so much that they would leave the house in tatters.  And because I know my children very well, although I do leave them unsupervised for small periods of time, I do not leave them for days at a time because this would not be in their best interests – despite all their assurances to the contrary.

The same could be said for their food.  If I left them to make all choices with food themselves they would choose to eat takeaway food for every single meal.  After all, it tastes delicious.  It is far more appetisin0g than greens and some meat. 

And I often think to myself that life would be so much more efficient and pleasant for everyone if my children just listened to what I was saying and conformed to it as I am only trying to direct them to THEIR OWN GREATER GOOD.  And I have been thinking about this with God…

“Thus, too, conformity of our heart with that of God is brought about when by holy benevolence we cast all our affections into the hands of His divine will so that they may be turned and directed as He chooses, and shaped and formed according to His good pleasure. In this point consists the most profound obedience of love, since it has no need to be roused up by threats or rewards or by any law or any commandment. It goes ahead of all such things when it submits itself to God because of that unique, most perfect goodness which is in Him. Because of this goodness, every will should be obedient, subject, and submissive to Him, and should be conformed and united forever, everywhere, and in all things to His divine intentions. (Saint Francis de Sales, “Finding God’s Will for You”, page 10).

For God is only asking me to conform to His Will, which is simply so much better than mine…

For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.