Example

“You need interior life and doctrinal formation. Be demanding on yourself! As a Christian man or woman, you have to be the salt of the earth and the light of the world, for you are obliged to give good example with holy shamelessness.” (Saint Josemaria, “The Forge” at 450).

Driven by the Spirit (Stanley Spencer_

I am an eldest child.  I was not going to be an eldest child.  My older brother died at birth and that has always been a thing that I have considered in the formation of my behaviour and character…

I have reflected on the impact of birth order on behaviour and mannerisms.  After all, as an eldest child I have been a fairly responsible person all my life.  It is quite normal for me to consider the good of others and the impacts of my decision-making on them when I make my own decisions.  Often I will complain about this pressure on me as the eldest.  After all, I was taught all my life to look after my younger siblings and be a role-model for them – setting an example of good behaviour for them – and just as I finally got the hang of it, they grew up and refused to listen to a word I said to follow an instruction I provided…

And so, I have always had the attitude of a big sister and I have always known that my younger siblings are watching my behaviour (and mimicking my example – or at  least that is what I was always taught by my parents and grandparents).  In a way this caused me to grow up before my time…

Saint Josemaria wrote in “The Forge” at 450, “You need interior life and doctrinal formation. Be demanding on yourself! As a Christian man or woman, you have to be the salt of the earth and the light of the world, for you are obliged to give good example with holy shamelessness.”

And I have been reflecting on those words over the last few days.  You see, it is one thing to consider the impact of my actions when they are relatively good.  When I am honest and direct and charitable and thoughtful and empathetic, that is when it is easy to think of the impact that I have on others through my example.  However, there are other impacts also…  There are impacts relating to the shameful and sinful things that I have done.  What of the example when I am weak and lazy and sinful?  What of the example when I am dishonest and gossip and envious?  Who is watching that behaviour also? 

And what is the impact of such behaviour?  Is it simply that people copy the bad that I do?  Not really.  The real impact of such behaviour is that people distrust the GOOD that I do and in this way my bad example has a greater impact on others than my good one.  And it is obviously the case.  Think only of a person accused of murder.  Would any of their good deeds be viewed favourably against that badness?

And I have been thinking about this today as I have been thinking about the power of evil to slip so easily into my life.  And it seems to me, that there is just so much more that I should be doing to set a good example – and also (when I think about it) so much less too…

For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.