Forgiveness

I think of Saint Paul the Apostle.  All those martyrs that He had killed – the greatest harm he could cause another – ALL of them had to forgive him, or none of them could worship with Him in eternity.

Holy Trinity (Byzantium Icon)

I have been reflecting – this new year – on the importance of forgiveness.

It is actually pivotal to our religion.  There is literally NO WAY that I can be Catholic or Christian if I choose not to forgive.  This is one of those things that cannot be separated in any way from my worship of God.  Christ Himself said – in the prayer that He taught us – “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”  Sometimes I think that because we say so many millions of “Our Fathers” during a lifetime, we lose the meaning in the words.  Sometimes, all that repetition deadens our senses to what is going on and we fail to really understand what it is that we are really saying…

When I was a little girl learning the “Our Father” for the first time, I did not even know what a trespasser was.  I just repeated words that my mother taught me and used those words when I was asked to use them.  As I grew older, I began to learn more about the prayer through my teachers at school.

After my little baby went to heaven before I was ready to let him go, I began to pray the rosary with a few ladies from the Church, as I happened to stumble into the room one day as they were gathered to pray.  After their prayed, they would chat with each other.  One of the ladies there (they were all elderly and I was a young mother in my thirties) spoke about how she struggled when her adult daughter was diagnosed with cancer.  I remember listening quietly to her story.  She said that the only way that she found to cope and bear the news and times that followed was to pray the “Our Father” very slowly each time she became worried about her daughter.  And so – without really speaking to anyone about it, I began to do the same when I felt terrible grief for my son…  And this allowed me to really focus on the words of the prayer. 

God is asking me to forgive others in the same way that I want Him to forgive me.  That is a BIG ask.  Just think about it.  If I do not fully forgive my brother, sister, husband, child or friend, then God will not fully forgive me.  If I do not fully forgive my enemy then God will not fully forgive me.

Think of the trade-off…  For a bit of remaining pride and stubbornness I would surrender salvation.  How could I be so short-sighted?

I think of Saint Paul the Apostle.  All those martyrs that He had killed – the greatest harm he could cause another – ALL of them had to forgive him, or none of them could worship with Him in eternity.

THAT is how important forgiveness is.  It is a trade-off of my pride for God’s Love and without it, I cannot enter into the LOVE of God eternally – I can only remain in shadows.  And the moment I realise that I must surrender my pride for that is the moment when I will surely be saved…

For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.