If our religion were a cult, we would be aiming to save everything for our own community.But we Catholics (and Christians) are not a cult – we are a FAITH!
I have been reflecting on the words of Saint Therese of Lisieux over the last few days and weeks, because though she was a brilliantly talented writer, even she at times struggled to express herself…
“I cannot tell you all I would like, my heart cannot translate these intimate feelings in the cold language of this earth… But one day in heaven, in our beautiful homeland, I shall look at you and in my look you will see all I would like to say to you, for silence is the language of the blessed inhabitants of heaven!”
And I have been reflecting on these words because they are a reflection of the insecurities that I feel inside my own heart and soul. You see, I too write – though nowhere near as brilliantly as this beautiful saint – and I too feel the inadequacy of my ability to express myself!
And yet, here I sit plodding away – key-stroke by key-stroke – writing a little bit each day in my muddled effort to adore my God…
And every time I write, I think… It is not good enough, I have not done well enough, it is not what I should like to show – and even so, I simply finish the task and publish it anyway.
Because I want to be like the sower in the parable that Christ told…
“A sower went out to sow. And as he sowed, some seed fell along the path, and the birds came and devoured it. Other seed fell on rocky ground, where it had not much soil, and immediately it sprang up, since it had no depth of soil; and when the sun rose it was scorched, and since it had no root it withered away. Other seed fell among thorns and the thorns grew up and choked it, and it yielded no grain. And other seeds fell into good soil and brought forth grain, growing up and increasing and yielding thirtyfold and sixtyfold and a hundredfold.” (Mark 4:1-20).
You see, that sower did not worry too much about where the seed fell – he knew that the seed was a very little thing after all. And so there he went, scattering seed everywhere… And then he waited. He knew that some of the seed would be eaten, some would wither away and still some more would be choked by weeds. And still he calmly trusted and continued to scatter those seeds. After all, each seed is only a little thing – just as the effort that I make to adore my Beloved is only a little thing. But just as the LITTLE seed became a GREAT harvest, so too can the Almighty work many wonders through all my little efforts in this life.
You see, if our religion were a cult, we would be aiming to save everything for our own community. But we Catholics (and Christians) are not a cult – we are a FAITH! And a faith SHARES with the whole world because God loves ALL PEOPLE and wants ALL PEOPLE to know and love Him! And this is why I write my little words day after day – no matter how inferior and insignificant they seem to me. Because we – as Christian community – are tasked to take our faith out to the world, because God wants “all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth…” (1 Timothy 2:4).
And Christ showed us this when He sent his apostles to go out and teach in His name… “And He called to him the twelve, and began to send them out two by two, and gave them authority over the unclean spirits. He charged them to take nothing for their journey except a staff; no bread, no bag, no money in their belts… So they went out and preached...” (Mark 6:7-13).
OF COURSE Christ could have done the job better Himself! OF COURSE God could have instilled the knowledge directly into everyone’s hearts and souls and converted the whole world without the help of mere men! But that is NOT what God did! Instead, God sent out His inferior disciples to do that job for Him and He sent them out with NOTHING…
And He did this because “The Spirit distributes gifts to different people just as He chooses. There is a variety of gifts but always the same Spirit; there are all sorts of service to be done, but always to the same Lord; working in all sorts of different ways in different people, it is the same God who is working in all of them.” (1 Corinthians 12:4-6).
And because I know this and I love Him for it, and because through the Holy Spirit, I am never really alone, now I can continue in all the little things – even when I really do not know what to say…
For with prayer, I stand on Holy Ground where everything is clear. Here. At the Foot of the Cross.